10 Moral Virtues for Success in Sales, Leadership & Life
There is much we can’t control in today’s insecure, rapidly evolving world. Most of it, distracting us from the one thing we can - the way we choose to lead ourselves.
I laugh when I hear virtues being described by leaders as “soft skills”. Soft my tooshie! They are the most powerful tool any human has in their wheelhouse & as a coach, the skills I spend most of my time developing with clients.
My new year planning always begins with reflection.
To support your’s, I’ve created a list of moral virtues. The ones I speak about most when working with coaching clients - sales, leaders or otherwise.
Each is followed by a few reflection questions to prompt your thinking & support the way you shape your own personal leadership moving into the new year.
The goal? To minimise unnecessary emotional churn & conserve your energy for the priorities which will support the success you aspire to.
Integrity
The single biggest lesson from my burnout experience was; none of us are designed to operate in a way that doesn’t feel right at our deepest levels. A niggle festers. It metastasizes with a stealth like precision, while we remain oblivious. By the time we notice, we can’t will it away. It must be addressed. The longer we “soldier on”, we risk making ourselves sick.
“Emotionally we feel grumpy, sad or numb. Physically our immune systems & muscles weaken; we might get sick, & even if we don’t, our energy flattens. Mentally we lose focus & clarity.
That’s how it feels to be out of integrity.”
Martha Beck ~The Way of Integrity
If something feels “off”, there is a reason for it. Regardless of context, the compounded cost of persistence, always greater than any immediate loss.
Courage lies with the individual who recognises their current path is no longer serving them well. They are willing to question their sameness. To accept uncertainty & walk away. To explore what they are experiencing, engage support for their decision making & move on. Fast.
Notice it. Be curious. Hold it lightly. What you are experiencing is the beginning of change.
With alignment comes abundance.
Self reflection:
When has your integrity supported your decision making?
When has your integrity been challenged?
How did you manage yourself through this process?
Humility
You are there to get it right, not to be right.
Challenged thoughts & “stuff ups” lead to uncomfortable moments. Oh & how love an imperfect moment! When diffused respectfully & explored with gentle curiosity, they have potential to be powerful facilitators of trust.
They are also powerful destructors when railroaded by an ego needing to be “right”.
Admitting we are wrong, holding ourselves accountable & accepting conflicting opinion, nourishes self-worth.
Humility is the cornerstone of acceptance. And with acceptance, comes inner peace.
Self reflection:
How many times have you defaulted to defend your stance in conversation?
How could you have approached the conversation with more humility?
What difference would this have made to the outcome?
Wisdom
A wise mind has done the work. It’s self aware enough to know how to set its human host up for success.
It’s confident in what it stands for, always protecting its connected soul by understanding what is & isn’t ok - on their terms.
Curiosity shapes its conversations. Change, instigated by decisions made from the information it uncovers. It’s an accepting mind, prepared for any outcome. At the ready to learn from mistakes or failures. Understanding there is no such thing as perfection.
A wise mind celebrates progress with humble gratitude, & selflessly champions others. It knows there is no greater joy than making another smile.
Self reflection:
What has been your greatest lesson in 2022?
How will you use this lesson to reshape your mindset or change your behaviour in 2023?
Compassion
Not everyone is ready for brutal honesty & raw vulnerability. In fact, it can be threatening & scare the bejeezus out of those who aren’t in touch with themselves.
Selflessly holding space for another while they tell their story is a priceless gift. To meet them where they are. Accept them for who they are. To reserve judgement. To support the inevitable journey of change that will accompany them releasing their story into the wild.
They will be forever grateful. Trust me.
Self reflection:
When did you hold space for someone this year?
How would you describe the impact that action had on your connection?
What stops you from holding space for another you care about?
Trust
Trust is contextual. Constantly calculated & recalculated based on data available at the time. It is not constant & is much harder to gain than it is to lose.
“trust is choosing to risk making something you value vulnerable to other people’s actions.”
~ Charles Feltman
No one has to trust us. It must be earned. Earned & continually nourished to be maintained. The moment you take trust for granted is the moment you loosen your grip on human connection.
Designing our communication & shaping our behaviour to foster trust is within everyone’s control. It’s a choice.
Self reflection:
How often do you consider your actions & words & their impact of developing trust?
What is one behaviour you could commit to, to foster trust with your Customer?
Discipline
Along with its close cousin persistence, discipline offers the fortitude required to maintain momentum in the face of adversity.
Moments when our motivation takes a dive & life feels heavy. Not a soul on earth is immune to this.
Recognising what is necessary to “maintain a pulse” & actioning with a disciplined approach, can see us through the toughest emotional terrain.
Self reflection:
What is your default behaviour when you are impacted by adversity out of your control?
How could a disciplined approach support your behaviour during these times?
Respect
You have your terms. I have my terms. Your customer has their terms. “Terms” are the boundaries we put in place to protect what is nearest & dearest to us. Boundaries are not barriers. They morph as trust evolves. Respecting others boundaries supports their respect in you.
It enables us to be the kindest version of ourselves.
Self respect:
How do you respond to your Customer’s boundaries?
What Customer boundary could you reframe differently to maintain engagement & evolve your relationship?
Patience
Patience is my virtue of the year. There are few things I admire more than someone who respects themselves enough to live life at their pace. It is silent. It is powerful, & reflective of a quiet inner strength. It enables us to hold our ground while we are being pelted with the distracting missiles of life.
Your Customer’s pace is their’s to own, for their reason. Meet them where they are rather than push them to where you’d like them to be. Never lose sight of what it means to them to have their mind changed.
Self reflection:
When could you have demonstrated more patience with a Customer?
What single behaviour will you approach with more patience in 2023?
How will you go about doing this?
Gratitude
There is enough for everyone.
Empowered living, leading & selling starts with being grateful for the smallest gestures that mean the most. An introduction. A recommendation. Forgiveness.
Ask for too much too soon & you’ll likely find yourself disappointed & disenchanted.
Be grateful for the little things that support your progress. Focus on the journey. The outcome (the sale), will be delivered when it’s ready.
If it’s easy to gain, likely it will be easy to lose. Remember that.
Self reflection:
How can you break down what you ask for, focusing more on progress rather than finish lines?
What progress milestones mean the most to you & your Customer?
Courage
Courage is a choice.
To ask the ambitious asks that give you the information you need to make sound decisions.
To move through uncertainty safe in the knowledge discomfort will pass.
To pursue with what is morally right for you, even if others disagree.
To change, evolve & challenge the status quo.
To look yourself in the mirror & know you are being 100% honest with yourself, takes courage.
Self reflection
When have you been held back by the fear of “not being good enough”?
What smokescreen story do you tell yourself to avoid fear?
If you were not afraid, what would be the first thing you do?
There you have it.
I’d love your feedback as I consider shaping this post into an inspiring keynote for 2023.
Peta x
Sales Coach | Commercial Growth Consultant | Keynote Speaker
Author of My Beautiful Mess - Living through burnout & rediscovering me
Volunteer Speaker for Beyond Blue
I am in the process of finalising my 2023 private coaching list & 2023 Kick Off meeting speaking schedule.
If you are curious as to what this could look like for you, reach out below. I’d love to connect & learn more about what’s important to you.